


No Need to Kill a Unicorn

by aerosmiley219



Category: The Good Fight (TV), The Good Wife (TV)
Genre: F/M, Kink Exploration, Shaving Kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-24
Updated: 2019-01-24
Packaged: 2019-10-15 06:46:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17523839
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aerosmiley219/pseuds/aerosmiley219
Summary: Kurt meets Diane at home after some time apart and they explore something new





	No Need to Kill a Unicorn

“I’ll be home in twenty minutes. Be naked when I get there.”

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me. Your place. Twenty minutes.” He hung up the phone before she had any chance to inquire further, or begin to rebut at all. Diane looked down at her watch and realized twenty minutes wasn’t going to be nearly enough time for her to wrap things up at the office, get lunch, get home and then shower. 

She’d need to clean herself up a bit, too, considering she hadn’t had a reason to keep her legs and other bits groomed since he’d been out of town, “no need to kill a unicorn, as the saying goes,” she laughed to herself. And he wasn’t even supposed to be home until next week! Diane had planned on going to her girl to get a wax on Monday so she’d be properly groomed and allowed time for the expected irritation to subside, by the time he got home.

“Who the hell does he think he is?” She looked at her computer, pulling up her calendar to find that her afternoon and all of the next day’s morning had been cleared, already showing that she was out of the office as of ten minutes ago.

“Oh.” She stood, staring at the screen for several moments before she realized she was just wasting time at this point. Diane grabbed her coat, valise, and her keys and waved to her assistant with a “thank you” in passing as she caught the elevator down to her car.

Diane hadn’t realized how much she’d missed him until she found herself running yellow lights and praying there were no red light cameras on her way home. How had she never noticed that before? She was sure she’d find out one way or another, either by ticket or by observation on her way in tomorrow. “Hmm, I wonder if I can be out tomorrow. I’ll need to check my schedule,” she thought as she pulled in to her parking structure.

She grabbed everything from her backseat and rushed up to her place, turning on the shower as she quickly disrobed, barely remembering to take off her glasses as she stepped into the hot water. Diane sighed, “god this feels good.” 

Again, she had to remind herself of where she was and why she was home in the early afternoon. 

She’d finished one leg and began the other when Kurt walked in the door. “Diane? It’s me. Where are you?”

Diane finished her other leg and reached for the can of shaving gel to lather herself when she heard him.

“I know I told you to be naked but this isn’t necessarily what I meant.”

“Oh!” She jumped at his voice and dropped her razor. “Kurt! You’re early!”

“It was twenty three minutes, if you’re counting.”

Diane opened her shower door and wrapped her arms around him, soaking him but not caring in the slightest. 

He kissed her back and began undoing the buttons on his shirt. 

Their tongues sparred as they kissed, each full of need and necessity.

He pulled back first. “Let me get undressed and I’ll join you.”

“Oh. I’m not exactly ready yet. Give me five minutes and I’ll join you in the bedroom?”

Kurt undid the buckle of his belt and began working on his jeans, kicking off his shoes and socks.

“Not ready? You look perfectly ready to me.” His eyes traveled up her legs, past her breasts, to her eyes. He grinned at the sight of her and found himself to already be semi-aroused.

“No. Well, I mean I didn’t have time to go to my girl to get waxed. It’s been a while.”

Kurt took off the remainder of his clothing and piled it in a heap on the floor. “Don’t care.” He stepped into the shower and pressed himself, especially his hard length, against her. Kurt pinned her against the wall, making her whimper at the shock of cold and from not being listened to.

“I mean it. I feel… unclean,” she replied, delicately.

“Don’t care.” He kissed her neck and shoulder, again pressing himself against her body to show her what she does to him. His fingers moved over her tummy down towards her slit when she stopped him.

“Kurt,” she exhaled, uneasy. “Please, let me…?”

“Remember what I said?”

“’Don’t care.’” She repeated. “But still. I guess I’m more comfortable with being clean shaven before you...”

He moved back to look at her, his lower half still pressed against her. “So you didn’t like my surprise?”

“No! Oh my god! I love it! You coming home early is always welcome.” She replied, her mind beginning to wander. “It’s just…”

“I know. I remember the first time you were unprepared. That night at the hotel. You were wearing that blue dress. You wouldn’t let me go down on you that night.”

She shook her head. 

He kissed the tip of her nose and moved back to take in her face, “even though it killed me not to.“

Diane shrugged, not yet able to look at him.

He thought for a moment and placed his hand under her chin, tilting it upwards to look at him. “I can shave you.”

“What?” She chuckled, nervously.

He looked at her, eyebrows high on his face, waiting for her to answer.

Her eyes grew wide. “Really?”

“I’ve never done it before but it’s always something I’ve wanted to try.”

“I…” She stammered. “I mean, I guess so.”

“We don’t have to. I just thought I’d offer.” He trailed a finger down her arm, watching the watery lines disappear with each movement. “And I do want to taste you.” Kurt kissed her neck as he mumbled these words against her.

“No. I trust you. If that’s something you want to do…”

“Good. Come with me.”

He turned off the water, picked up her razor from the floor, took hold of the shaving gel, then grabbed a towel, offering it to her as he stepped out of the shower.

“What? Now?”

“Yes.” He offered his hand, which she took, still somewhat uncertain and followed him over to the sink.

Kurt placed another towel on the sink before positioning her in front of him. “Ready?” He placed his hands on her hips and with one swift movement, placed her on the towel on the sink, standing between her thighs. He kissed her soundly, trying to ease her mind slightly.

“Relax baby,” he spoke into her lips. “It’s me.”

She paused and let out a sigh. “Yeah.” 

“What did I just agree to?” She asked herself, closing her eyes, not really knowing what to expect.

Kurt dropped to his knees and looked up at her, quickly noticing her lack of eye contact, something they both usually loved when he went down on her and sure this wasn’t exactly the same but he’s still in the same area.

To ease the tension, he kissed up her thighs and licked her slit, slowly, not caring in the slightest that she wasn’t perfectly smooth.

Diane sighed as she melted into the sink, ever so slightly, seeming to forget that she was unprepared and what was about to happen.

“Just relax,” he reminded her.

She nodded. “Mmhmm.”

He moved her legs wider and placed a wet washcloth over her to ensure she was still damp enough. Kurt put some shaving cream in his hands and lathered them before slathering it over her.

Diane tensed at the cold lather, again without thinking.

“Shh.” He kissed the insides of her thighs again. “You trust me?”

She looked down at him, into his eyes and realized she really did trust him. “Yeah.”

He smiled and reached for the razor, pushing her legs a little further apart and slid it up one lip. Kurt wiped the razor clean and continued on.

Several swipes had passed and, after feeling no discomfort, Diane looked down to him and watched his face. He was really enjoying himself.

She felt a small jolt of affection and started to get somewhat turned on. Diane smiled, trying to hide this, and realized she was enjoying herself, too. Diane finally let herself watch him as finished up.

Kurt placed the washcloth over her and wiped what little excess was left, standing to rinse the razor and cloth in the basin behind her. He dropped to his knees once more to clean her off before remarking without thinking, “perfect.”

“Not so bad yourself.”

“Hm?”

“I said you’re not so bad yourself.”

He tried not to blush and, in covering his tracks, Kurt leaned forward and placed his mouth on her forcing her back into the sink, harder, as her hands moved to the back of his head.

“Oh! Kurt!” Her eyes rolled back into her head as her fingers dug deep into his hair, tugging as pleasure hit her.

He grinned as he took more of her into his mouth. God how he loved how this woman tasted. It was off because of the taste of the shaving cream but underneath it all, it was still her. Kurt went straight to her clit, licking and flicking, sucking hard for several minutes to get her wet before sliding two fingers into her. He fucked her hard as he sucked on her clit.

“Oh sh… Kurt!” She whimpered as her breath caught in her throat, her fingers pulling on his hair harder. It’d had been a long time since they’d been together and not factoring in phone sex, it’d been that long since she came, since someone else had given her an orgasm. 

Her thighs began to shake as the muscles in her tummy coiled tighter.

“Kurt?”

He rose to his feet and picked up one of her thighs, quickly impaling himself on her, his mouth on hers. Before she realized there was a lack of contact, she was one step closer to having a killer orgasm. Kurt pushed into her, grunting with each thrust. “Come on baby,” he coaxed between kisses.

She nodded just before she came. It took everything he had within him not to follow suit. But they’d been away from each other for so long that he’d be damned if he was going to let things end this quickly. He held himself deep within her as he watched her face.

Once her breathing began to return to normal, he kissed her, slowly pumping himself into her. He pulled back slightly to ask, “bedroom?” Against her lips.

She nodded as he slowly let her leg down, not yet slipping from her in the process. 

Kurt tried to step back and chuckled when he realized she hadn’t let him go. Her arms were still wrapped around his neck. “Do you want me to carry you?”

“No,” she sighed, almost dreamily. “I just… wow. I missed you.”

“I missed you, too.” He kissed her once. “But right now there’s something important I need to do.” He flexed his hard length within her.

She looked down to see his point and she giggled. “Oh.” Diane kissed him hard, removing one hand from his neck down to his cock, stroking slowly as he slipped out of her.

“Ah,” he hissed at her touch.

“Bend me over in front of the mirror?”

“Yeah?”

Her hand squeezed him tighter. 

“Yeah.”

She released him and pushed him back a step to hop off of the sink.

He threw the towel she’d been sitting on, on to the floor as Diane turned around to plant her feet firmly on the towel he’d just tossed on the floor, bending over to grip the sink. She flirted, wiggling her ass, “ready McVeigh?”

“You have no idea.”

Kurt stepped forward and positioned himself behind her.

They caught each other’s eyes in the mirror before Kurt looked down and ever so slowly slid into her. She watched his face, that face she’d never tire of looking at, especially now, as he did, feeling so many things- delight, lust, love, pleasure, need. Their faces and bodies reacting as though she were a virgin, being touched for the very first time. God how he turned her on.

He slid himself all the way into her and finally looked up from where they joined. Diane had a smile on her face that was quickly morphing into pleasure.

Kurt reached forward and grabbed one of her breasts, placing the other on her hip as he slowly began to thrust.

Diane straightened and pressed her back against his chest, neither one severing eye contact, his five o’clock shadow gently scratched her tender flesh as he rested his chin on her shoulder.

“You feel so good,” she whimpered as his pace picked up. “Don’t stop.”

Kurt shook his head as his hand moved from her hip to her lower tummy. She placed one hand over each of his and would have sworn that she actually felt their connection grow stronger, his fingers digging deeper into her flesh without even noticing, but he felt it, too.

Diane pulled his right hand from her lower abdomen down to her clit, showing him how she needed to be touched in that moment.

He groaned. He loved it when she took the lead, especially when it came to what she needed, sexually. Kurt’s middle finger parted her folds and immediately hit her clit. Diane shivered at his touch.

“I… I need…”

“Tell me what you need,” he ordered as he pushed into her harder.

She fell forward onto the sink and clutched the edges. Kurt fell with her, not expecting her movement, still not stopping his finger from what it was doing to her.

Diane moved her hand from the sink to his balls behind her and tugged gently, pushing back into him and looking into his eyes once more, panting in pleasure. She grinned as his hips plowed into her, seemingly of their own volition.

Her fingers gripped the sink harder as she felt her second orgasm coming.

“You’re close.”

All she could do was nod.

“Me too,” he grunted into her back.

She nodded again, knowing but not able to verbalize it.

He picked up his pace, his thrusts becoming somewhat erratic. His finger rubbed her harder and faster, begging her body to release with each movement.

She groaned as she came, her hand moving from between them on to her clit. Almost simultaneously, Kurt moved his hand from her clit to her stomach to steady her as she fell forward.

“Yes!” She screamed.

Kurt grunted, biting his lower lip, determined to watch and feel her ride this out on him. He didn’t know where he’d get the stamina but he was going to try.

She shook and groaned loudly as her body spasmed against his.

“Oh shit.” She struggled to catch her breath as she looked up from the sink to see his smirk. “Cum… cum for me.” 

He nodded and squeezed her breast once more before dropping his hand to her hips. Kurt thrust himself within her twice more before he let himself climax.

“Kurt!” She whimpered, watching his face make all the same goofy expressions hers just had as he came deep within her. 

He grunted several times as he slammed into her, his body tensing over and over, before finally letting out a satisfied, “ahh.”

Diane smiled as she slowly stood again, needing to feel his chest pressed against her. Kurt rode out the last few shocks of his climax and opened his eyes, grinning. He placed a kiss on her shoulder as his hands wrapped around her stomach. Diane placed a hand on the side of his head and the other on top of one of his as he slipped out of her.

“Take me to bed?” She asked.

“What? I just…” He panted, incredulously.

She giggled, “I know. I just want to hold you for a while. Can we do that?”

He smiled somewhat bashfully. “Oh. Yeah.”

They climbed in under the covers and held each other, kissing some more, touching one another all over, gently and intimately. She asked about his trip, he asked about her work. She thanked him for clearing her calendar so they could be together. They were quiet as Kurt kissed down her neck and along her jawbone, his fingertips walking themselves down her stomach.

Moments later, he touched her clit and chuckled as she twitched. “Still a little sensitive?”

She nodded. “Mmhmm.”

“Just as well. I’d love to take another bite but that shave gel tastes awful.”

She giggled. “I’m sure I taste different by now.” She smiled before continuing, “I noticed it on your lips. Didn’t taste like me at all.” Diane licked her lips in a show of how much she enjoyed tasting herself on his mouth. “Do you think they make strawberry flavored shave gel?”

Kurt laughed. “I don’t think so. But they do make fragrance free cream.”

“I’ll pick some up.”

“So, the experience, it wasn’t too bad?”

Diane blushed. “Actually, I really enjoyed it. It was incredibly intimate.”

He kissed her and ran his hand along her jawline. “It was.”

“Do I get to do you?”

“Any time. Just give me a little time to recoup, though. I’m not twenty two any more.” He placed another kiss on her lips as he ran his hand up over her hips.

She giggled. “I meant do I get to shave you?”

“I know.”

“Well?”

Yep.”

“Not even going to ask where?”

He kissed her, his lips lingering a bit longer this time.

“Nope.”

She smiled again, not realizing how much the thought truly appealed to her, as she moved in closer to him. “Welcome home.”

He nuzzled her and inhaled her scent. “Mm.”

**Author's Note:**

> if you don't get the title, look up "shaving legs + unicorn"


End file.
